With less than 48 hours left to go in this pregnancy (gasp!) I am having some conflicting emotions.....For one, I can't BELIEVE it is almost over....it's funny how a pregnancy can seem to take forever and fly by at the same time.  I am ready to NOT be pregnant in sweltering heat.....but I am nervous about the c-section....(I think knowing what to expect makes it a little worse, not better!)

I will NOT miss:

-being huge in 113 degree heat

-getting up ten times a night to pee (I don't remember doing this last time!  Maybe this baby is sitting right on my bladder or something)

-having a hard time playing with my kids (getting on the floor, getting back up off the floor, lifting them from the bathtub, etc.)

-not being able to paint my own toenails.

-HEARTBURN....WAYYYYY worse this time, which I totally don't understand!

-being uncomfortable while trying to sleep (now I KNOW this part was worse last time, but it's still no piece of cake trying to get comfortable)

On the flip side, I will miss:

-eating what I want, for the most part. ;)

-wearing stretchy pants.

-feeling a baby move inside me.

-anticipating the arrival of another member of our family.

-being a family of four...although I know I will love being a family of five, too! 

-sleeping (uninterrupted) until nine thirty in the morning!  

-having a "schedule"....

-being able to go places by myself....

It's funny how conflicted I feel....I know I will be more than a little sad when this is over, because it is 99.9% decided that this is our last baby.  (a fact my husband reminds me of when I complain of heartburn, contractions, etc...) I sort of feel like we sped through the "building a family" portion of marriage....we didn't get married early, so we got started right away having kids....then we got two at once....then we got another one right away....I guess I had them all so close together that the feeling of "being done" or "enough kids" hasn't caught up with me yet.  Rationally, I know three kids is "enough" for us....it just feels so FINAL to say we are done for sure.  My doctor asked me a few weeks ago if I was going to want her to tie my tubes during the surgery, and we told her no.  (Even Shawn!) Although we are probably done, the act of "tube tying" feels too final, too sad...and all of this emotion about "being done" is really hilarious given how much I am looking forward to getting this baby out of my body!!  It's just a really complex situation....I have lots of friends who say that I will "just know" when I am really, REALLY ready to close the door on having babies...I hope I have a feeling that telling, and SURE.  I can't imagine spending the next ten years wondering if I still want another one....too unsettling!

For now, I am going to try to focus on Thursday....the excitement of hearing her cry for the first time, getting to hold and inspect her.....deciding who she looks like in our family, getting the c-section OVER WITH, showing her off to all our family and friends....I can't believe it's almost here!!!!  

Birthday party at the farm....

Sunday our good friend Parks had his fourth birthday party at Fiesta Farms.....we have been talking about/building up this party for about a week, so the babies knew they were going to a farm with animals....Shawn had told Hayden about riding a horse, and she responded, "Well, we'll see."....we knew she was probably not going to cooperate, and we were right!  Shawn tried to put her up on the horse, and she screamed and clung to him like he was trying to throw her into a vat of acid....Cale did a little better...cried while getting on the horse, but actually stayed on and tolerated his ride.  They LOVED the big sandy area with toys, and Cale kept telling me, "My like-a the dirt."  He is very easily entertained.....no big party tricks necessary for him.  He loved the pinata, and came running (from the dirt) when he heard them calling for the kids.  Sissy screamed the whole time the kids were hitting the pinata, once again confirming our assessment that she is a pacifist, unless she is the one doling out the violence. :)  Neither baby was interested in the hay ride, but they liked looking at all the animals, especially a TINY baby goat.  It was an ADORABLE place for a birthday party...and I held out for quite a while before being a hundred months pregnant took it's toll on me....we had the best time, and headed home with two very tired, sweaty kids.  (One who decided to take his tennis shoes and socks off in the car and shake out all the sand!)

Silly time with Daddy....

These babies really, REALLY love their Daddy...the best time of their day is when he comes home, and he is never too tired to do anything they want to do....the "fun thing" for this week is playing in our room, on the new rug we got.  We bought a super squishy pad to go under it, so my poor kids basically think they got a new trampoline.  They love to hop all over it, and roll on it, and jump up in the air and land on their bottoms on it.  (which doesn't look that comfortable to me, but oh well.)  Tonight when Daddy got home, the three of them went in there and were literally howling and squealing...I had to go get the camera and find out what was going on.  What I found was a bunch of nonsense...tackling, football throwing, running back and forth around the room.....just what a two year old thinks is fun!  These pictures crack me up....I know I will look back at them years from now and remember them the way they are in these pictures....in a diaper, with no pants on (hey, we weren't going anywhere!) smiling and laughing with their Daddy!  

Finally!

My friend Natalie suggested this a LONG, LONG time ago.....having your blogs bound into a hardcover book using Blurb.  I LOVED the idea, and got started right away (more than a year ago) but found the undertaking MISERABLE since I was working with a horrible excuse for a computer.  I started thinking about my unfinished project a few weeks ago, and felt bad since I am hundreds of entries into blogging about this family, and still no book to show for it.  I figured this book would be the best record of our kids' lives, and it was a really cool way to document all our memories....why blog if it's all just going to get erased later and forgotten?  So I finally sat down and finished it.....it was WAY easier than the first time I tried to create this book....I learned some tricks that helped make it go more smoothly, but I am also working with a WAY better computer this time....it was fast and super easy to finish the book and order it!  It arrived today, and I LOVE it!  It is such a special thing to have for my kids later....now I am just wondering if I should order another one so that they both have a copy....not that Cale will care about it later, but his wife might.  (Did I really just say that?)  

The process was so easy, I finished Volume Two and already started on Volume Three.  Since I started blogging when the babies were born, I am making each volume last a year, from May to May.....I highly recommend this for any of you bloggers....it is a really nice memento, especially if you have long ago fallen off the scrapbooking wagon like me!  

From the mouths of 27 month olds...

Hayden, when I told her her Daddy was home: "Daddy!  You're home!  I missed you!"

Cale, discussing the incident where he dropped an eight pound weight on his foot and bled all over the place: "Drop it on my foot.  I cry.  Sit on the couch.  Get a band aid.  Get a popsicle."

Hayden, talking about the pie I was eating: "I want pie.  I share it with my sister."  

Me: "Who's your sister?"

Hayden: "My sister Livi, in Mommy's tummy. She comes out last night."  (she understands that the baby is not coming right now...I guess "last night" means "some other time".                               

Cale, every time we are getting ready to leave the house:  "Go doctor?  See Livi?"...he clearly understands the frequency of third trimester OB visits. 

Hayden, about to leave the house: "Mommy!  I'm yeady!"  (all the r's are y's, as in "I'm yeading my book", "I'm yight here!", "I yike it!")

Hayden, when we discussed with her the need to surrender her pacifiers to Livi when she arrives: "Well, we'll see."

Cale, all day, every day: "Momma, I play with my big truck.  The digger.  The dump truck."  He talks and talks about trucks, and points them out ALL over the place.

Hayden, when her Daddy told her there would be a pony for her to ride at a birthday party: "Well, I'll think about it."

Cale, as I was singing to them in the car, "No, Mommy, Mimi sings that."  Apparently he is worried about copyright infringement already.

Cale, discussing falling out of his bed: "Momma, I fall out of my big boy bed.  I was jumping."  The funny thing is, Shawn asked me later if I knew Cale had fallen out of his bed, and I told him that he had already discussed it with me....my babies are getting big enough to tattle on themselves (and each other!!)

Hayden, when getting admonished or corrected: "No, Mommy, YOU be a good girl!"

"No Mommy, it is NOT ridiculous!" and "Go over there!"...she points to another place in the room, as if she's trying to change the subject or distract us...

Hayden, when I told her she was going to stay in time out until she told Cale she was sorry for hitting him: "I am NOT sorry!" (I'm telling you, this one is a MESS!...I told Shawn when God was handing out personality, this kid got in line twice.)

Both babies still love to discuss the time Cale pooped in his swimsuit in the sprinkler. 

Hayden: "Bubby, don't poop."  (every time the kid puts on his swimsuit...he'll never live it down)

Cale: "I poot.  In the sprinkler.  Momma wash it out." (They were both very interested in me hosing the poop out into the yard.)

The babies' view in the new car...

We have been discussing the purchase of a new car for awhile....we knew we were probably going to have an issue fitting three car seats into the middle (and only) row of seats in my Tahoe.  I thought maybe, MAYBE it might be possible, but the idea of Bubby and Sissy being that close to the new baby (and able to hand her tiny, choke-able items without parental supervision) led us to think a car with a third row was in our future.  We looked and looked (and by "we" I mean Shawn, who gives new meaning to the term "research"....the man researches to a point where I would have just given up....but that is why he is good at finding the deals!) and finally found a used Escalade here in town.  Before you get too excited, it IS used, but is still fancy to me!  My specifications were:  I wanted captain's chairs, and leather so that puke could easily be washed away.  Other than that, I was happy with whatever he came up with.  We put the babies into the very back row, so that I won't have to hoist Livi over seats into her new seat....which is not so easy being heavily pregnant!  Luckily, everyone has been helping me get the babies strapped in, and I have been trying to keep my trips out alone to a minimum.  This bigger car is funny....I can't hear what they are saying half the time (maybe not a bad thing??) and I can't hand them anything, which they don't understand.  They can't have Sonic drinks, mainly because I don't want them crapping out my new car, but also because I can't reach them in the event that I need to snatch the drinks away in a hurry if they are playing "dump it out".  Today in the bank teller waiting line, I snapped this picture of them....far, far away from me in the third seat....they both have this picture taking thing figured out...as I was taking it, they were both saying, "Cheese, Momma!  Cheese!"  In case you were wondering, Hayden is indeed chewing on her shoeless foot....for some reason, we have entered a phase where the shoes come off the MINUTE we get in the car, which adds a full five minutes of shoe putting on when we get to our destinations....what is up with that?  

More fourth of July pics...

At the Maziur's pool party, the babies LOVED floating in the little boat....but hated all the floatation equipment we made them wear.  Cale pulled and pulled at his little floaty suit until I took it off, and then minutes later "the incident" occurred...him falling face first into the pool sans floaties!  

Big Holiday Weekend!

We had a busy, busy weekend, which explains why it's not quite dark outside yet, and both babies are in bed, unbathed.  They are, as my friend Amy puts it "chlorine clean", so that's better than nothing I guess!!  Friday we were lucky to have Daddy home from work, so we ran a bunch of errands and enjoyed our lazy day, and then headed to a friend's house for a birthday/fourth of July pool party.  Cale was not so interested in swimming (or his floatie suit), but LOVED this little play sink they had on the porch.  He washed and washed the little pretend dishes...let's hope he loves washing REAL dishes that much.  (I'm not holding my breath).  At one point, he tried to fill his little cups up with water from the pool, and fell right in.  Luckily we were sitting right there, and all I had to do was grab his little arm and pull him out.  He went right on about his business, so I am guessing he had the sense to hold his breath....there was no sputtering or crying, so he's either a daredevil or clueless!!  Sissy was a little more of a swimmer, especially the next day when we headed to a family get together.  She jumped and jumped off the pool ladder, and wanted Daddy to throw her high in the air.  She kept telling us, "Climb me on that ladder!" so she could jump again!  Cale, again was busy with other activities...namely walking around the yard nude and trying to pull a giant toy front end loader into a baby pool!  Besides it being a thousand degrees, it was a really good time....I was even brave enough to pull on a big maternity tarp and swim in the pool at both parties...the heat trumped my self respect, so in I went!  It was great, and made me wish we had a pool....I didn't feel pregnant at all while floating!  Saturday night, we watched fireworks (the babies' THIRD time) and Cale finally didn't cry!  He keeps telling us they are "noisy" and "go boom in the sky"....It is so fun that they finally care about "tradition-y" things.  

We are sad to have Daddy go back to work tomorrow, but our week is filled with errands and doctor's appointments...my OB wants to start seeing me every week from now on out, and the contractions are getting CRAZY....she isn't sure I am going to make it to 38 weeks, which is fine by me.....except I still have a LOT to get done by then!